The 11 Laws of Likeability- Tips that will make you a likeable person
Do you sometimes get envious of people who are liked by everybody? Or do you wonder how that one person leaves an everlasting impression on someone? If yes, then don’t worry! You can also become that person who is liked by all. Want to find out how? Continue to read on!
The 11 Laws of Likeability by Michelle Tillis Lederman is a book that will help you enhance your personality by working on the much-needed communication skills. This book will guide you on how to hold the conversation and make it interesting. By the end of this book, you will also see a visible change in yourself in terms of: Understanding yourself better, identifying the topics that you are passionate about, and how to leave an everlasting impression on someone.
Some tactics mentioned in The 11 Laws of Likeability to increase your likeability quotient:
- Be genuine and your authentic self to make a good impression on people
The first law mentioned in The 11 Laws of Likeability to form a good impression on others focuses on being genuine and authentic self. When you are genuinely concerned about a person’s well-being or knowing about their life is when they actually start seeing the human side of you. After a person opens up to you, the next point that must be kept in mind is to not judge them.
Opening up to someone and displaying vulnerability does not come naturally. It takes a lot of courage and effort. The author mentions a quick tip to understand the situation of others before judging them. He urges the readers to place themselves in the shoes of those people and think about what you would have done if you were in their situation. This will make things easy and will restrict you from judging them.
Instead of judging them, you must work on being super supportive to them. Following this first step can actually set you apart from all other people and will make you more likeable.
You can check out the book summaries available on various book summary websites if you want to learn these laws of likeability in detail.
- Try to avoid events or functions that rip you off your authenticity
We have all been in a situation when we were forced by our parents, colleagues or our friends to attend a party that we were least interested in. How did you feel after reaching that part? Not yourself for sure. It is because in order to feel like ourselves we need to be surrounded by people that are just like us. Surrounding yourself with like-minded people will give you that much needed confidence and authenticity.
Therefore, from now on when you will be asked to attend such functions, take some like-minded friends along with you. And if given a choice, you must avoid the event altogether.
- Have lots of self-belief and confidence to become more likeable
You must have surely met people whose words did not match with their body language because of which they appeared under confident. The author adds a tip here to ensure that your words and body language are in sync. While speaking to someone try keeping in the three V’s necessary for an effective communication. These Vs stand for Verbal, Vocal and Visual. When your words(verbal) compliment your tone (vocal) and body language (visual), your self-belief and confidence increase. Thus, making you a more likeable person.
- Inquisitiveness or curiosity can make you a good communicator
In The 11 Laws of Likeability there are two types of questions mentioned: open-ended and probing that will help the other person understand that you are genuinely interested in what you are speaking.
Open-ended questions begin with what, how, when or how come. These questions ensure that the dialogue between the two people keeps running. The author bags this point with stating an example. Imagine being at a fashion show and trying to start a conversation with the person sitting next you. Asking them open-ended questions like how they found out about the fashion could be a real ice breaker rather than asking did you learn about this fashion show from the brand’s website. The latter one will defuse the conversation even before its beginning.
If you want to learn more about these laws and what makes them effective, then you can read the book summaries available on various book summary apps. The other type of questions i.e probing questions, act as good follow-ups. Some examples mentioned in the book are: Do you mean, I’m wondering why you say that or please elaborate. Listening patiently to what others have to say is also a great way to make you an effective communicator.